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Ep 107: Awakening the Soul - Embracing Redemption (Part 2)
"Have you ever felt worthless to God? Today, Pastor Mark Crabtree continues sharing his journey from addiction to hope through a life-changing encounter with the Holy Spirit and God's transformative love, promises, and redemption."
Ever wondered how a single moment can completely alter the course of your life? Pastor Mark Crabtree shares his incredible story of transformation from despair to hope in this episode. Once lost in disbelief and addiction, Mark recounts his extraordinary encounter with the Holy Spirit during a seemingly ordinary day, which led him to a life-changing church service in Hamilton, New Jersey. His powerful testimony reminds us of the relentless love of God and the life-altering impact a personal relationship with Christ can have.
Together with Pastor Mark, we explore the promises of God and how they apply to our lives today. Through engaging and often humorous discussion, we unpack how these promises, affirmed by Paul as "yes and amen," are crucial for believers. We also reflect on the idea that as co-heirs with Christ, believers share in both his sufferings and glory. Pastor Mark's insights into Jesus' own trials, including his empathetic understanding of human distress, offer a relatable perspective on the transformative power of the cross.
As the episode unfolds, we confront the notion of redemption and the lies that lead us to doubt our worthiness. Pastor Mark emphasizes the importance of faith in Christ to make us acceptable to God, despite our sins. By surrendering to God’s transformative power, we can experience the fullness of life through His Spirit. Be inspired by Mark's journey and consider letting the Lord guide your path, preparing you for both the challenges of this world and the eternal glory to come.
Sr. Pastor, Refuge Church:
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Assistant Pastor, Young Adults & Families, GraceWay Bible Church:
https://gracewaybc.org/who-we-are/our-team/
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Speaker 3:I never thought I'd have another opportunity to be a parent again. You know, he took this kid, this bitter, depressed, mixed up kid, and placed him on solid ground and gave him a hope and a future. You know, jeremiah 29, 11 is my life verse and although it doesn't apply, it applied to the Israelites then, and I don't take it out of context. I do believe we have a God that never changes and I believe we serve a God who is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow.
Speaker 1:You're the only name. You're the only name.
Speaker 2:You're the only name.
Speaker 1:Hello and welcome to Plays on Word Radio, where we discuss, analyze, work and play on the Word of God. Thank you for joining us on this excursion. Today let's join Pastor Teddy, also known as Fred David Kenny Jr, the founder of Plays on Word Theater, as he does a deep dive into the Word of God. Amen.
Speaker 2:Amen. Well, we are going to continue our interview with Pastor Mark Crabtree of Refuge Church in Robbinsville, New Jersey. Check him out.
Speaker 3:I called my dad up and I said Dad, I don't know what to do. This is what's happening. He goes to me. Mark, why don't you come to church with me tomorrow? This was Saturday night.
Speaker 2:And I went Dad, it's always God with you, like God's the answer to everything. And I hung up on him. So I go to sleep that night. I can see him saying that too. I can see him saying that. That's funny man, yeah.
Speaker 3:He wasn't even fazed. He was just like well, why don't you join me at church tomorrow? Mark and I was. That was the last thing I need to hear is to go to church to honor and worship this God that just mocked me, that just refused to let me have comfort and relief.
Speaker 3:And so I wake up on Sunday morning and I am dead set that I am going to finish this job. I am going to. He's not going to stop me this time, man. If I could have laid down a bigger gauntlet to him, I would have Right, Right, and so I literally um, I left my apartment to go to Wawa. I'm in Philly and I left to go to Wawa, which was right down the street.
Speaker 2:Wawa is everywhere in Philly.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, right, every corner, everywhere, but North Carolina, right, hey they're, they're coming, they're coming down here. North Carolina. That's right, they're on their way, so, um, we should just open them as I, as I drive down there, but anyway I drive. There's a traffic light between my apartment and Wawa right, and so I'm sitting at that traffic light right, and I'm sitting here and I'm thinking in my head and I'm even probably saying out loud you're not going to stop me this time, I'm getting this done.
Speaker 3:Who are you to stop me? I'll show you right. And like a ton of bricks, the spirit falls down on me, breaks the spirit falls down on me and I start weeping. Yeah, his presence, weeping under the weight of the presence of the holy spirit. Not a weight of shame and guilt, right, but the same weight that crushed the atheism in lee strobel was crushing the guilt and the shame that I was feeling. It was it, it was the weight of relief that he was bringing on me. And so I'm going to Wawa to get a cup of coffee, because I was going to go home to my apartment and write goodbye letters, right? So I'm at this light and I'm weeping.
Speaker 2:Now, and the next thing I know I'm making a U-turn to go back to my apartment, I get changed.
Speaker 3:I grabbed a Bible. I don't even know where the Bible came from and I take my story behind to church.
Speaker 2:Amen.
Speaker 3:And I take it to the church that my dad is here in Hamilton and I'm going to tell you Teddy I didn't even know how to get there.
Speaker 2:I was in Philly.
Speaker 3:I didn't even know how to get to his church in Hamilton. I'm saying, you know, I just didn't know the way I would have had to put in a GPS, but I was weeping so bad that I couldn't see squinting my eyes trying to see through the water of the tears. I couldn't even tell you how I got down Route 95 and into New Jersey and across the bridge.
Speaker 2:I couldn't even tell you, I couldn't even tell you.
Speaker 3:I remember pulling in to the parking lot of the church and at the marquee sign of the church, the sermon that's being preached that day is rebuilding your life, wow I like that and I sat in the second row of edinburgh road chapel at edinburgh road in hamilton and I weeped for two hours as the worship went on as Pastor Doug Mindak gave his sermon and I weeped under the reality of the risen Christ.
Speaker 2:Yeah, man.
Speaker 3:The encounter that I had with him, that, even as I cursed him and even as I blamed him, he said Mark, I love you, mark, I went to the cross for you and I would do it again, 10 times over, if it meant having a relationship with you. It had nothing to do with me desiring to have a relationship with him. It had everything to do with his desire to have a relationship with me. And that is the reality of an encounter with the risen Christ, and that is the reality of an encounter with the risen Christ. Yeah, right, and from that very point forward, my life was radically changed. I never touched drugs again that day, you know, my life changed in ways that I didn't even realize at the time. At that point, I had hoped I could get through the next minute and now, coming up on 12 years, later.
Speaker 3:I think back to that moment and, um, I have a beautiful wife and I have a daughter who I never thought I'd have another opportunity to be a parent again. Um, you know, he took this kid, this bitter, depressed, mixed up kid, and placed him on solid ground and gave him a hope and a future. You know, jeremiah 29, 11 is my life verse and although it doesn't apply, it applied to the Israelites. Then, and I don't take it out of context. I do believe we have a God that never changes and I believe we serve a God who is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow, and so the same promises and the same character and the same love that he gave the Israelites when he told them I have a plan for you, not a plan to cause you harm or do you evil, but a plan to give you hope and a future and to prosper you. You know, that doesn't mean we're going to be sunshine and rainbows and all of us are going to end up rich like Elon Musk, right, but it means that we will be spiritually prosperous and filled with, with the reality of him and, and because he's timeless, I think we can still hold on to those same promises that he promised that the Israelites through through Jeremiah, and um, so, yeah, he, he sent me on solid rock and and so I became a fireman after that.
Speaker 3:And, um, I met my wife at that church and I think I told you the crazy part, you know. You tell you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. And you know I had said to him Lord, I want a Christian wife, I want a Christian girlfriend, I want a Christian relationship, but listen, I'm not gonna find her at church. Like what a weird place to date church. Right, yeah, that was august 11th 23rd august 12th 2013.
Speaker 3:I said that to him after I got my faculty straight and um on the end of september 2013. I look up on the stage of the worship team as we're praising and worshiping and there is j playing the keyboard for the worship team and I went oh who's that? And in 2016, her and I were married. And but yeah, so the funny part on Jennifer is that, although she walked with the Lord for her life and stayed faithful, she had told the Lord you know, I want a Christian man and I don't ever want to be a pastor's wife.
Speaker 3:And so there she is a pastor's wife, and a good one at that. But that is my journey. Condensed version.
Speaker 2:Amen. Telling the Lord your plans is always humorous, I think, from his perspective, Like you know, and I hope One day he shows us the DVD of how we told him our plans.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:In spite of that he still made a lot of the stuff work out. You brought up an interesting point how the Scriptures apply and the promises of God, because he doesn't change, he doesn't change. And Paul in 2 Corinthians, chapter 1, he says as many as may be the promises of God in him, they are yes, wherefore also by him is our amen to the glory of God. Basically, paul's talking about the promises of God. Because the enemy hit me with a lie early on, long, long time ago, hit me with a pretty effective lie. He said you know when God says I never leave you or forsake you. He was talking to Joshua. He wasn't talking to you, teddy, he wasn't. You know. He wasn't talking to you. The scriptures don't apply to you. He was talking to other people. That's other people's mail you're reading, teddy.
Speaker 2:And it was such an effective lie. It really caused a sense of depression to me because I bought it and conveniently, the enemy did not bring up 2 Corinthians 1, verse 20, where Paul is saying the promises of God are yes and amen to those in Christ. If you're in Christ, the promises they do apply to you. To give you a hope in know, to give you a hope in Jeremiah to give you a hope in a future. I know the plans I have for you. That applies If you're in Christ. That is yes and amen. That applies to you, and so the enemy is pretty tricky like that, and so I just wanted to.
Speaker 3:If he's going, to do it to Jesus in the desert, who are we. Right? I mean he says to Jesus right in the desert yeah, who are we right?
Speaker 2:I mean he says to jesus right in the desert.
Speaker 3:He says oh well, jesus it's written yeah, they know that the angels will save you, right, but but how does jesus combat him with the word? He turns and says it is written yeah right, we it's. It's so important for us to know the promises that are in scripture and and um how they're applied. It really, really, truly is, and and one that I always try to remind myself is you know, not only are we brought and grafted in to the family of Christ, right, Not only are we adopted and grafted in as we are his own children.
Speaker 3:but scripture tells us that we are co-heirs with Christ, Co-heir with Christ. So everything that Christ is entitled to as an heir of the father.
Speaker 3:we are entitled the same way as co-heirs. And in Jewish culture at that time you could have one son who was the oldest son, who was the heir, but every child got something. It was less and less as you went down the line, but everybody got something. But Jesus says, hey, I didn't go to the cross for you to get something, I went to the cross for you to have everything. And like wow, wow.
Speaker 2:That's an amazing concept. It's an amazing concept and when you think about it it's like wow. That makes it just that much more impactful to us and our walk. Especially if you're bummed out right now or depressed in any kind of way, recalibrate it with the Word man. We are co-heirs with Christ, and that doesn't mean we don't share in sufferings, but we also share in His glory. That's, that's right.
Speaker 3:You know that's right. If, the, if, the transformative power is through the cross, then let me be crucified, right? Yeah, that's a hard statement for us to live up to, but but you know, if, the, if, if, the, if, the, if the cross brings resurrection and new life is it?
Speaker 1:not worth it?
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, god thought it was worth it.
Speaker 3:Jesus knew it was worth it right you know, something I I remind my young adults about and anybody that's listening I want them to be reminded too is that we often say that jesus came down, um, and part of it wasn't just salvation right, I mean, that was the gift, that's the wow you. But he also came to relate to our experience. You know, the word know that we use in the Greek is gnosko, and gnosko is not to intellectually know something, but it's to know it through experience.
Speaker 3:And so Christ doesn't just know us because he knows who we are and he formed us in the womb and he created through the words, but he knows what it's like to be us yes, and so when I remind my young adults and I think it's very important in today's culture is it doesn't just mean because he was ridiculed and rejected and hurt in emotion, but as we were going through that that least roble book, I'm reminded I was reminded through um of the apologetic aspect of hematidrosis and that was the condition that Jesus went through in the garden, where he sweat blood, right tears of blood.
Speaker 3:Hematidrosis is not a physical, I mean, it's the physical manifestation of a mental condition. You only encounter that through extreme psychological distress. So, even if you think well, it never tells us in the Bible that Jesus had mental health issues, that Jesus went through psychological trauma. Yes, it does. It tells us that because he experienced hematidrosis in the garden, he absolutely experienced psychological trauma as a man, right, he, he, he had anxiety because he knew what he was about to encounter and he even said, father, if this cup can pass from me please, if there's another way, but it's the flip, it's the end of that said, but if it's your will, right, your will be done. Yeah, and so you know, I try to remind he said his soul was overwhelmed.
Speaker 2:That's right with sorrow to the point, to the point of death. Yeah, and that was in that same garden passage there. Yeah, he's uh overwhelmed. I mean, we kind of read over that quickly, but that's yeah he was literally overwhelmed with and he, from his humanity, he was like listen, you can do anything. Let's uh take this cup from me, right and yeah.
Speaker 3:And yet he had the power at any time to call legions of angels to save him oh you haven't seen you haven't seen the peat play yet, have you?
Speaker 2:No, I'm hoping that when you'll bring that to us in Graceway.
Speaker 3:I know Katie's been contacting Pastor Don.
Speaker 2:That's a real heavy scene man. That section is, I believe it.
Speaker 3:I relate to Peter. I think a lot of us do, but my experience, I feel like I have Peter. I relate to him, man, even to the points where the Lord reprimands him.
Speaker 2:Yeah, thank God for Peter, because I tell you, man, you know he has foot and mouth syndrome, but don't we all. And so if the Lord can use him, hey, there's hope for me, even Peter's transformation.
Speaker 1:And so if the Lord can use him, hey, there's hope for me, that's right. And the Lord didn't cast him away, even Peter's transformation, that's right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, the Lord didn't cast him away and even restored him. Do you love me more than these? Hey, I got a question, though, sure, in your testimony there you said you know you were headed for hell. You said you know you were, you know you were, you were headed for hell, and that's. That's a fascinating statement, because I remember, before the Lord really turned the light switch on in my life and brought me back to a right walk with him, I figured, man, I had screwed up enough, I had messed up, like my, I had messed up and there wasn't really any kind of chance for me. I'm done, you know I'm'm done, I'm going to hell. Man, I messed up. What would you say to someone that is maybe even thinking along those lines like, yeah, it's good for them, they have redemption, but there's no way God will accept me because I purchased my ticket to hell, because I did X, y, z?
Speaker 3:I would say yes, that's exactly where God needs you to be. When we think we have it figured out, when we think I've got one more trick up my sleeve, we're ultimately circumventing God, right. But when we're at a point where we say I've got nothing left, it's over, it's done, that's when the Lord goes yes, yes, that's where I need you. Now let me do the work. And so what I would say to them is never give up one more day. And what I would say is even if you're questioning and you're not sure you know, is this God real? Ask him. Ask him to show you the reality of the risen Christ, and he will do it. He may not reach in and just make everything sunshine and rainbows, but he will show you the reality of who he is. He will show you the reality of who he is. And there's redemption. There's, there's always room for redemption, amen.
Speaker 2:There's always.
Speaker 3:There's always room for redemption.
Speaker 2:Amen, yeah, His, his sacrifice basically says that, states that and makes you know he he paid way too high a price for you to know him.
Speaker 3:That's right.
Speaker 2:Put it this way, he is heavily invested in us, him, and so and know, have him on our side. Is that wants you to fail? If anything, that's expressive of somebody who is above and beyond on your side that's right wanting you to succeed, and so.
Speaker 2:But the enemy is so, so slick at at amplifying our own stupidity, helping us. You know, because I don't want to blame the enemy for everything, it starts with our fallen self, and then he's usually their fan in the flames. But you know our own stupidity of you, know God's against me. God must hate me, god must be angry with me, or God will never accept me. And so I just, I agree with what you're saying, man. That place is the starting place of like. Okay, yeah, and you know what the truth is. God will not accept you. You're not good enough, no one is good enough, not one of us is good enough, and we're not acceptable, apart from Christ, apart from faith in Christ. But when you put your faith in Christ now, you become a co-heir, like you said, co-heir, co-heir, and we stand in him because Christ is acceptable. See, that's the thing, christ. His sacrifice was accepted, he is accepted, and so, by faith standing in him, we stand in a righteousness that's. That is not our righteousness, because our righteousness means nothing.
Speaker 3:That's right. You know I that that deception of the enemy man. Let me tell you if you think you're strong enough to withstand his deception you're going bigger and better men than us have fallen. Yeah, and he's been around too long man.
Speaker 2:He's been around too long and he's had too long, too much time to practice.
Speaker 3:Yes, and he knows scripture far better than we do.
Speaker 2:He's in church every Sunday.
Speaker 3:He is, that's right. Every Sunday he's in church, and you know what I think sometimes, even as Christians, we forget that the enemy can sit in church with us and he does. But you know two things that you were saying.
Speaker 1:Number one is and if I had, to say to somebody and anybody that's listening, is you are not identified.
Speaker 3:You are not defined by your sin. Your sin does not define you. Christ defined you right, what you have done is what you have done. But you know not only you know it's not that God simply just says, ok, you did that sin and this sin, and you know, I'm going to pardon your sentence. That's not what he does. It says that he takes our sin and he removes it as far as the east is from the west. That is an infinite, infinite distance.
Speaker 3:He says that our sin is, if we never committed it, right. That's amazing. He doesn't cover it up, he doesn't um, take it and put it in a box and put it on the shelf to never be open again. He destroys it, he makes it so that you never did it like that reality is almost hard to wrap our minds around. But that's the reality of the restoration that we're in. It's not that he just heals it and you know you have the scar to show. No, the scar is gone because it never happened. You know it is such a we I don't think any of us will ever understand the true reality of our salvation. And so we are on the other side of glory, standing in his presence with an eternal perspective to say and in that moment everything will make sense.
Speaker 2:It's all going to make sense. I get it Everything makes sense.
Speaker 3:Yes, and, and it is. Ah, man, it really is the truth of him and his, his, the deception of the enemy. You know it's so strong. It's so powerful that I'll leave this with you and whoever else is. Do you know when Jesus was crucified? Right and we can debate, did he?
Speaker 2:go to hell? Did he not go to hell? Did he go to heaven? We can have that debate.
Speaker 3:All we want clear in this fact is that he snatched the keys of death right, that he went down to Sheol and he offered those there a chance to leave. And there's some that didn't do it. Would you imagine being? You've left earth, you've died, you've gone down to Sheol and you're sitting there in your suffering, in your guilt, in your shame for eternity, suffering through this and all of a sudden, one day, jesus, the risen Christ, the Messiah that you heard was coming but you never knew about, and he's sitting in your face going hey, I have the keys to your cell, come with me and you go, I'm good.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like men love men, love darkness man. That's the problem. It's not that there's not enough light, it's that men love darkness because their deeds are.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and all that person has to say is okay, open my cell, I will follow you out. That's how easy it is. That's how easy it is.
Speaker 2:I tell you what we're yeah, we're. We're up against the clock. Now that's okay. It's God's clock. What is the uh? When do you guys meet? What's the address of your church?
Speaker 3:Um, right now we're we're meeting at um, the first Baptist church of Robbinsville, building at 22 main street in Robbinsville. Um, if, putting into Google Maps, I suggest you just look up Refuge Church in Robbinsville, because there's 222 Main Street. You'll get confused, but especially if you're not familiar with Robbinsville. We meet on Saturday evenings at 530. We have a time of worship, we have a time of prayer, we have a time of message and then we share a meal together, a fellowship meal, after every service. It's it's potluck. Um, you know, don't feel obligated if it's your first time to bring it, we would like to serve you and, um, you know, we want to fill your soul and fill your belly at the same time. So I'll tell you what, even if you're not sure about this God thing.
Speaker 1:but you're hungry and you ain't got food in the cupboard.
Speaker 3:Come down and get fed and I promise you you will encounter the risen Christ.
Speaker 2:Amen, Amen, Well, we'll. We'll put a link up in the show notes of that Uh absolutely Absolutely.
Speaker 3:You know, I just want to put it out there. I am the. You know I said I was the young adult pastor. I teach young adult Sunday school there on Sundays and our Sunday service there is, uh, eight, 30 and 10, 15. And um, but that's on Sunday mornings at Graceway Bible church in Hamilton and uh, we hope to have you guys out there, I think at the end of next year I think is what they're talking Maybe September, october of this year, this year, september October this year Possibly.
Speaker 2:Amen, all right, all right, my brother. Well, god bless you.
Speaker 3:Hey brother, I love you guys. I miss you guys. Can't wait to see you guys next week.
Speaker 2:Tell everybody you said hello, man, love you, bro. Bro, I definitely will love you. Amen, amen.
Speaker 2:I hope you guys were blessed by listening to to Mark's testimony there and, you know, just be encouraged. The Lord can save him, he can save me, he can save you and not just save like then radically change and live through you. And this is just a foretaste of what's coming. I would implore you to give your life to him, give your life over to him. Give him the keys, man, give him the keys. Aren't you tired of driving? Give him the keys, let him drive, let him fill you with his spirit and live life the way it's supposed to be lived. And this is still on this side of glory. So when we do get to glory, we're going to be like, yeah, we've been walking with him a long time, all right, that's all I'm going to say about that. Until we meet again next week, may the Lord bless you and keep you. The Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you. The Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.
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